Everything you may wish to know.

Terror Clown™ has been the bedside companion of American children ages 3 and up since 1948. Our in-house panel of survivors has evaluated every production run since 1952. We stand behind the product.

This is normal. Terror Clown™ is shipped and stored in a resting position. Minor settling may occur during transit, during temperature changes, and occasionally during the night. If the apparent movement persists beyond 14 days, please contact our Customer Letters Department.

The teeth are cosmetic.* They are hand-polished to a museum-quality point as a matter of craftsmanship, not function. Under most conditions they pose no risk to the child. *Consult included safety pamphlet for full context.

The standard Terror Clown™ is silent. Sound production is an optional accessory (see Voice Box Module). Any sounds originating from Terror Clown™ without the Voice Box Module installed should be reported to the Customer Letters Department for investigation.

Terror Clown™ is a passive toy and does not require adult supervision for its own operation. As with any companion toy, parental discretion is advised. Many families report that Terror Clown™ becomes an integral part of their child's bedtime routine within three to four nights.

Terror Clown™ is a lifetime companion and, as such, is not eligible for return. We offer a thirty-day exchange for manufacturing defects, evaluated at our Millbrook workshop. Please note that Terror Clown™ cannot be returned once a bond has formed.

The Haunted Headboard Bed is a piece of fine furniture. Any paranormal activity associated with the bed is not manufactured or implied by The Pennywhistle Play Company. Activity of this kind is not covered under the standard warranty.

We currently ship within the contiguous forty-eight United States. Alaska and Hawaii are available with a surcharge. International shipping is available for Pocket Terror Clown™ and Red Balloon Bundle only. Larger Experiences do not survive customs.

A proprietary gentle-sway mechanism is built into the harness to produce a natural, lifelike motion that children find soothing. The mechanism is tuned at our factory and cannot be adjusted by the customer. Sway that appears to accelerate should be reported to our Customer Letters Department at once.

The Pennywhistle Lifetime Companionship Warranty covers defects in porcelain, enamel, stitching, and mounting hardware. It does not cover cosmetic teeth chipping, outfit fading, or reports of the product's behavior. For the avoidance of doubt: behavioral reports are documented in the Customer Letters archive but do not constitute a warranty claim.

Custom commissions are accepted on a waitlist basis. The waiting period is currently estimated at two to three years. Please write to the Customer Letters Department to join the waitlist. Commissions are produced in their own order at the kiln's discretion.

The Millbrook workshop is not open to the public. Our products are available through this catalog, through select American department stores, and by standing order from families who have maintained an account with the company for at least one generation.